010 ✫ Video

[useofaswhat]

[When the feed comes on it catches a shot of the winter landscape in the CES. In the foreground, Mal's stepping out of the room and brushing off his overcoat, singing a song as he does – not exactly well, but enthusiastically and happily enough that it doesn't matter that he's a little off-key, or that he only remembers half the lyrics.]

Good King Wenceslas looked out
On the feast of Stephen
When the snow lay round about
Deep and crisp and even
Brightly shone the moon that night
La da something something
When a baker came in sight
And gave the king a dumpling.

[Grinning cheekily, he shakes the snow out of his hair. New flakes take their place nearly immediately and he presses on, occasionally running his hand through his hair as he speaks.] It's been such a spell since I last sang songs this time o' year that I forgot the words. I know one of y'all has to know 'em – own up.

Also, anyone got an extra hat?

[Private to the Admiral]

We got you playin' Saint Nick, huh? If you're really holdin' up your end of this, I got a few requests. Natasha could do with a recording of a ballet – a Russian one, an' not the one about the Firebird – on whatever video tech they've got in her time. Dean's gonna need a compass pretty gorram bad, and... if Steve and the Barnes kid don't have the medals they'd'a gotten, I think they deserve 'em. Ariadne could use a file about buildings from the 2100s onward. [Because friends help friends get ahead by ripping off concepts from other universes, right?] For Wanda... Hell, I feel like that kid needs a month-long supply of whatever treat she best likes. And, uh, a flower for Zev, maybe not a dead one? 'Cause I don't want her green friend makin' me into mulch.

Right.

So xie xie in advance – I'm trustin' you.

Comments

[mightymorbid]

What are you doing?

[useofaswhat]

At the moment? Breathing, walkin', talking to ya – I'm multitasking.

[mightymorbid]

[Singing makes him so uncomfortable]

The music is necessary?

[useofaswhat]

[Because he's all about your comfort, Moze.] Nope. Snow on board ain't necessary either, but we still got that. What's the song hurt?

[mightymorbid]

Vital brain cells?

[useofaswhat]

You ain't gonna miss 'em.

[mightymorbid]

I strongly disagree. I mourn them. Pine after them.

[useofaswhat]

And I'll go on an' sing at the funeral.

[mightymorbid]

Don't do that.

[useofaswhat]

You're really gettin' your pigtails in a twist about this? I think I got a way to fix that – there's this magic button on your communicator, makes all the singing stop.

[mightymorbid]

Who is Wenceslas?

Of what realm was he King?

[useofaswhat]

I don't even remember the song. You think I know?

[mightymorbid]

You should know if you're going to sing it.

What does this king have to do with the holidays that take place around now?

[useofaswhat]

It just gets sung a lot 'round Christmas. I'll bet you we can find ten people on board who know that ditty and don't know who the king in it was.

[mightymorbid]

But it has nothing to do with this holiday.

[useofaswhat]

'cept people sing it for this holiday.

[mightymorbid]

Why?

[useofaswhat]

Why do you got a flying snakefish?

[mightymorbid]

[Xerxes glances quizzically up at Mozenrath, and his fins move as though he's shrugging.]

[Flatly] Conversation piece.

[useofaswhat]

Right.

I'm guessing the reason behind the song's about as solid as that one.

[mightymorbid]

So you're pointedly withholding information, too?

[useofaswhat]

D'you think I am?

[mightymorbid]

No, I don't. [He doesn't think you're that clever.]

[useofaswhat]

Well, who knows. You could be right. [Who's the one who just publicly announced he has hidden secrets?]

[mightymorbid]

I often am. [It's not a secret, Mal. He's just not telling you. You might start singing again :|]

[useofaswhat]

Really. [He's still smiling that shit-eating grin. It's not a challenge in tone, but it might as well be.]

[threadjack with apologies] [video]

[je_suis_avec_toi]

Actually, sirs, the song does have to do with the holiday. In the Catholic faith, the Feast of St. Stephen occurs within days of Christmas.

That is the Feast of Stephen referred to in the carol.

I am sorry I don't recall who King Wenceslas is exactly, but I think he was another saint.

[threadjack with apologies] [video]

[useofaswhat]

See? She knows what she's talkin' about. That good enough for you, Mr. Fishwife?

[threadjack with apologies] [video]

[je_suis_avec_toi]

Thank you.

public; audio

[theonlyresponse]

[And just where Mal finishes, Bruce picks up. He's on key:]

Hither, page, and stand by me
If thou know'st it, telling
Yonder peasant, who is he?
Where and what his dwelling?"
"Sire, he lives a good league hence
Underneath the mountain
Right against the forest fence
By Saint Agnes' fountain.


Glad to see that one lasted.

public, audio

[useofaswhat]

That's how the rest of it goes? No wonder I never learned it.

public, audio

[theonlyresponse]

Never too late to start. Do you know any others?

public, audio

[useofaswhat]

A few of 'em. I ain't sang a one since I was a little critter myself but I used to know the one about the twelve days that goes on forever and a couple more of the churchy ones.

public, audio

[theonlyresponse]

That's plenty enough. I'm going carolling later, if you want to join.

[Video]

[silvestris]

Now why would I do that? I like your lyrics better.

[Video]

[useofaswhat]

Rhymin' ain't my strong suit. You watch, a couple more lines an' it'll be "da da da da tree, da da da da me."

[Video]

[silvestris]

Still an improvement over what you hear on the radio these days.

[Video]

[useofaswhat]

I beat out the music from your time? It's really that bad?

[Video]

[silvestris]

I'll put it this way, there's a song about dating a fish head.

[Video]

[useofaswhat]

Oh God, I don't even wanna know how that works. You got my condolences.

[Video]

[silvestris]

[She laughs] No, you really don't. Especially not if it's put to a catchy tune to get stuck in your head.

So your song wins...but I guess you could argue it's not much of a competition.

[love_slave]

No extra hats, I'm afraid. [But she's wearing a tinsel boa right now, she'll just play along until it wears off of everyone.]

[useofaswhat]

Darn. Guess it's frozen ears for me then. Pretty scarf you got there.

[love_slave]

There's a comment I could make here about warming those up for you, but I'm a respectful lady and not supposed to flirt with you. I remember. [She's going to indirectly tease anyway though, and do so with a waggy finger.]

And thank you.

[useofaswhat]

And I'm – thankin' you for that in advance. [Way to make his face go as pink as his ears!] Not that the offer ain't appreciated.

[love_slave]

[Aw, the pink gets its own little grin.] I'll find you a hat. I've seen a couple of the red floppy cone ones with the fur lining around. It should match your sweater.

[useofaswhat]

Hey, no need to worry. You don't trouble yourself over my hat.

[love_slave]

Nope, too late. Now I'm on a mission, so you'll have to owe me a favor.

[thestarspangledman]

Y'know, I'm not sure the song exactly goes that way. [He's smiling, though, gently teasing.]

Could be wrong, though, it's been a while since I've heard it.